Say or be?
Recently I haven't been online too much, busy doing bits and pieces for my new company. It's been fun so far. The full lift-off will be in the first week of April probably. Can't wait.
Me and Margus (my new boss) were chatting the other day about cultural differences, what is characteristic to this or that culture. When it comes to estonians then big bunch of us are humble, not too outgoing, shy when meeting new people and at times not too outspoken. When it comes to discussions and stuff, then quite often estonians don't say out loud things that are obvious for them whereas in many other cultures people are saying out everything that comes to their mind. I've seen this in many international conferences and noticed it among my friends. This leads me to my question: do you have to all the time prove how much you know by saying out everything you know? Sure, when you don't say this or that, other people don't know that you know. You know? I know people that whenever they can are trying to show off their knowledge or say something just for the sake of seeming smart. Seeking recognition? Ego gratification? Or built-in and the person is not even aware of this? I'm not saying it's a bad thing. Nobody likes a smartass, but still. Perhaps it's even better like this. You can raise other people's opionion on you better this way. Or lower it, if you're dumb. As the joke is, its better to be silent and let people think you're stupid than opening your mouth and proving they're right.
I personally often don't say things out. My self-worth is not derived from what other people think of me. I don't feel the need to prove myself to anyone but me. Actions always speak louder than words. Should we care how other people feel about us? Should we constantly show everybody how smart we are? There is a heavy competition in the world, so sure, this way you'll have an edge. In a workplace situation I totally agree, that's the way to go often. But afterhours? People show off with numerous things, from cars to clothes to dance moves. A couple of weeks ago Ali was telling me about this event he attended (organized by his father or smth), where one of the people present was dressed down compared to other people, looked more than a random guy from the street than a hotshot businessdude. Later Ali asked his father who was this dude and he found out it was the guy who had achieved the most in business in that event. He didn't feel he has to prove everybody how rich or whatever he is. He knows he rocks and that's enough. Amen, brother!
I think people worry too much about what other people think. Live your life for yourself, not for other people. And if you feel you have to tell everybody what are great person you are (and better than others), then get a life. There's nothing cool about being superior to other people. True nobility lies in being superior to your former self. Run your own race.